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Three steps in moving on from a painful divorce

It may go without saying, but divorce is every bit the beginning of a new stage of life even though the pain that one may go through may suggest that it is only the end of life. Going through a divorce (and the split of a family) may be one of the most difficult experiences a person may go through in life. Nevertheless, life does go on, and it is essential that divorcees prepare to live on.

With that, there are a number of important things that divorcees must do so that they can begin enjoying life instead of spiraling into lifelong depressions. 

Give yourself time to grieve – There is nothing wrong with shedding tears or feeling bad about the demise of your marriage. (Some may call the divorce a relief, but the raw feelings leading up to it may still linger.) Either way, it is normal to feel down after something you thought was going to be forever turned out not to be so.

Accept your position in life – Hindsight is like 20/20 vision. This means that we can see all the things we should have done after they happen, but we don’t have the ability to go back in time to make them right. We must take the circumstances we have as they are right now and do the best we can to create a different life.

Define a new vision for yourself – To reach a peak, you generally have to start in a valley. Use this time to figure out what you want the rest of your life to be like, including the fun things that you want to enjoy and what you want to accomplish. 

Source: HuffingtonPost.com “Divorce: Not just an end, but a beginning too,” DD Richards, Jan. 31, 2014

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