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Counseling can help children of divorce

Indeed, divorce can be emotionally difficult for the spouses involved. After all, it is the end of a relationship that the parties believed would stand the test of time, and the sense of betrayal (or cruelty) can have lifelong consequences. The turmoil of divorce can also have a detrimental effect on children. Kids have a unique sense of blaming themselves for the demise of their parents' relationship, and this can also lead to destructive behavior. 

This is why counseling is not only beneficial for parents, but for children as well. While working with a therapist or counselor may seem like just another cost, there are several reasons why divorcing parents may want to consider it.

Reassurance - With the world shifting right under their feet, kids need to be reassured that the break up is not their fault, and that mom and dad still love them and will be there to support them.

An outlet - Some kids may need an outlet to express their feelings, especially if they are uncomfortable doing so to their parents. Without it, they may be bottling things up inside and may lash out in an inappropriate manner.

Developing skills - Kids of divorce can develop important problem solving and coping skills that will keep them away from at risk behaviors.

Loyalty between parents - Children may feel guilty about having strong feelings for both parents, and may feel as if they must choose sides. Counseling helps to alleviate that pressure. 

Parenting skills - Parents can also benefit from counseling, for they can learn about how destructive behavior between parents can affect children. 

Source:, Kids in the Middle - Support during divorce, September 27, 2013

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