Divorce is hard enough by yourself, dealing with the advice and opinions of family and friends can be nerve-wracking. While they may feel like they are trying to help, their opinions could make things that should not be difficult during a divorce unbearable. Suffice it to say, there comes a point in every makeshift therapy session where a potential divorcee has to make a decision about the advice they are getting.
We understand that many of our clients are in this situation and have had a number of stories and expectations before coming to a lawyer. Because of that, we offer this post as a way to handle the recommendations (and criticisms) that may come your way.
It’s your decision, and people have to deal with it – Some divorcees are told “you’re not working hard enough to keep the marriage together.” While this may be true in some instances, they may not know the entire story of your marriage, and they probably don’t understand that you may not want to work on the relationship with your spouse any longer. Because of this, the critics must understand that it is your life, and your decision on what to do about the marriage.
Every divorce is different – You may be setting yourself up for disappointment by gauging what you are entitled to (or what someone owes you) based on someone else’s divorce. Because every situation is different, your divorce will be adjudicated according to the unique circumstances of your case.
Apply a filter – While listening to advice, don’t feel guilty about filtering out emotional barbs against your ex and demands to abscond with children or property.
Source: HuffingtonPost.com,” How to deal with unwanted divorce advice,” Bob Tomes & Jane Warren, November 2, 2013