Now that Thanksgiving has come and gone, the holiday season begins in earnest. If you are in a troubled marriage, and have survived a holiday gathering, you may not be looking forward to the next few weeks. This is especially true if rumors have been swirling about the state of your relationship, or if you are considering divorce. After all, you may feel as if you are in an awkward position.
On one hand, you want to make the holiday season special for your children and other loved ones. On the other hand, you don’t think you can stomach another season of fake displays of affection and horrible treatment by in-laws. Moreover, you don’t want to subject yourself to an eternity of resentment for ruining Christmas for everyone involved.
So what can you do?
According to a recent HuffingtonPost.com report, decisions to end marriages should be made carefully and reverently (ironically, just like a decision to get married). Essentially, there are many other people’s feelings (particularly children) that will be affected. The possibility of kids growing up and associating Christmas with divorce should be considered.
Nevertheless, if living with a person or dealing with extended family is too much to begin with, then perhaps being “selfish” and making changes for your own well-being is necessary. In that case, other people’s feelings may become unimportant. After all, you’re not well-liked to begin with, so why vie for popularity.
Regardless of whether you choose to split or stay, a support system is key. This way you will have people in your corner who can help you past the problems that put you in this position in the first place.
Source: HuffingtonPost.com, “Is it ever okay to separate around the holidays?” Kelly Coleman, November 25, 2013